Kennedy Njoga

24/12/2022

Holiday

27/05/2022

27/05/2022

If there’s a career in Kenya which doesn’t make sense is journalism. You study it for four years then they employ comedians who don’t have papers.

27/04/2022

A woman called the police station one evening and said: "My husband has gone out with a girlfriend and right now I am going after them. I have a gun and when I find them, I will shoot both of them dead".

The police asked, "Where exactly have they gone?".

Woman: They went to watch a certain comedy show.

The police rushed to the theatre to make sure they arrived before the woman.

When they entered the theatre, they took the mic from the comedian and announced:

"If there is a married man here and has come with a girlfriend, you must leave immediately. Your wife is coming right now with a gun to shoot both of you dead".

The police were surprised that the door became small as everyone was running out and the show ended because even the comedian himself ran out!!!.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Happy weekends to everyone here with Kennedy Njoga

27/04/2022

Inooro hwaini😅😅

26/04/2022

Someone praying about their childs educational needs. May your prayers be answered. Amen.

22/04/2022

Mwai kibaki ong'ielo *orengo*

22/04/2022

RIP TO THE 3RD PRESIDENT OF KENYA
MWAI KIBAKI

24/02/2022

Hi

29/01/2022

Wa Ngai nduri mugaruri

29/01/2022

If you could bring somebody to life, who would it be?

24/01/2022

Wanaume tafadhali ,hii mambo ya kutafuna matiti muache na kuitwist k**a kifuniko ya gas ...K**a hujui romance wachana nayo kabisa🙄🙄🙄😥

24/01/2022

Ushai jiuliza mbona Smokie huuzwa pamoja na Mayai ??

Akili mtu wangu😅😅

Don't forget to follow 💯

24/01/2022

Mjifunze kubalance makeup, nimeona mwingine uso ni mpya lakini miguu ni ya zamani🏃🏃🏃😎😎

24/01/2022

Madem ni wale brown skin hawa wengine ni nguvu ya giza 😆😅😅😆😆

23/01/2022

WIFE MATERIAL 😋😋😋

Just a free advice 😉 ukitaka kujua wife material
1-Mkimeet na yye tao for a weekend out she'll just tell you 'beb si we just take a drink then twende home nikupikie juu namiss kukupikia' uyo ni wife material wachana na hizi burukenge zinajua hoteli zote tao💯...nkt
2-Mkifika kwa nyumba anakuambia beb wacha kwanza nifue hizi nguo ndo nipike si you know your smartness is my happiness...sio hawa wakuuliza 'beb kwani uku akunanga mama wa kufua akufulie hizi nguo?'🙄..kiriminoo wewe nkt.
3-After kupika anakuambia 'beb ingia baff oga kwanza umefanya job mob sana leo,baada umeoga she serves you a well cooked food,sijasema mikorogoo ya mashakura get me right please...sio hizi nuguu hukupatia chakula na ujaoga💔oshindwe
4-After kula atakuambia beb tushukuru Mungu kutulinda all day na protection tukilala sio hizi tumbili zenye hukurukia as if ukimaliza kula utatoroka.🏃
5-Mkienda kulala wife material atakuingilia bed na night dress sio hizi acrobats zinakuja bed ndethe nikaa mtu anataka kuoga🙆‍♂️ogopa hao kapsaa
6-Wife materials are always gentle ata shot moja tuu atatosheka na alale poa...sio hizi sokwe za guarana you eeeeeat,eeeat...unathani swara imelala unaskia anakusongea ati 'kwani beb unalala' saiyo kisiagi imezima na mafuta imeisha🥵nnnnkt.
7-Ukiamka anakusomea Bible ndo utoke bed. Sio hawa nugu hukuamsha na blow job na kumeza $p3rm$ K**a cerelac.😋
8-Alafu lastly, wife material before atoke ataosha nyumba,aoshe viombo sio hawa mbuni hukuambia 'nipee panty yangu na ujue sina fare'🤒 nkt...Today am moodless nisibishane na mtu😅🚶‍♂️

23/01/2022

Hello there, after finding out that my sperms are 99% females. I have decided to sell them.Damage is 50k. If I fail to father a girl I pay you 50k.Hurry while stock last. I father chocolate girls. Skin colour of the mother doesn't matter. If interested inbox🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝

23/01/2022

MY PRAYER
Dear Lord,we left home for a purpose.Don't let us return home empty handed or in a casket.

Can i hear Amen.

20/01/2022

Ukipata bae wako kwa bed na mtu mwingine what will be your first reaction 🤔
😂😂😂😂😂😂🤣

20/01/2022

How do you tell your visitors politely that it's time to go home?

29/09/2021

SOME SOCIAL RULES THAT MAY HELP YOU:

1. Don’t call someone more than twice continuously. If they don’t pick up your call, presume they have something important to attend to;

2. Return money that you have borrowed even before the person that borrowed you remember or ask for it. It shows your integrity and character. Same goes with umbrellas, pens and lunch boxes.

3. Never order the expensive dish on the menu when someone is giving you a lunch/dinner.

4. Don’t ask awkward questions like ‘Oh so you aren’t married yet?’ Or ‘Don’t you have kids’ or ‘Why didn’t you buy a house?’ Or why don't you buy a car? For God’s sake it isn’t your problem;

5. Always open the door for the person coming behind you. It doesn’t matter if it is a guy or a girl, senior or junior. You don’t grow small by treating someone well in public;

6. If you take a taxi with a friend and he/she pays now, try paying next time;

7. Respect different shades of opinions. Remember what's 6 to you will appear 9 to someone facing you. Besides, second opinion is good for an alternative;

8. Never interrupt people talking. Allow them to pour it out. As they say, hear them all and filter them all;

9. If you tease someone, and they don’t seem to enjoy it, stop it and never do it again. It encourages one to do more and it shows how appreciative you're;

10. Say “thank you” when someone is helping you.

11. Praise publicly. Criticize privately;

12. There’s almost never a reason to comment on someone’s weight. Just say, “You look fantastic.” If they want to talk about losing weight, they will;

13. When someone shows you a photo on their phone, don’t swipe left or right. You never know what’s next;

14. If a colleague tells you they have a doctors' appointment, don’t ask what it’s for, just say "I hope you’re okay". Don’t put them in the uncomfortable position of having to tell you their personal illness. If they want you to know, they'll do so without your inquisitiveness;

15. Treat the cleaner with the same respect as the CEO. Nobody is impressed at how rude you can treat someone below you but people will notice if you treat them with respect;

16. If a person is speaking directly to you, staring at your phone is rude;

17. Never give advice until you’re asked;

18. When meeting someone after a long time, unless they want to talk about it, don’t ask them their age and salary;

19. Mind your business unless anything involves you directly - just stay out of it;

20. Remove your sunglasses if you are talking to anyone in the street. It is a sign of respect. Moreso, eye contact is as important as your speech; and

21. Never talk about your riches in the midst of the poor. Similarly, don't talk about your children in the midst of the barren.

22.After reading a good message try to say "Thanks for the message".

APPRECIATION remains the easiest way of getting what you don't have...

29/09/2021

ME AND MY WIFE 😂😂😂😂

Last night i had a serious fight
with my wife just because i was drunk,
and she made me promised her never
to get my self drunk again which i did.
Today I went to my friends birthday party my collegue at my working place, we all ate, drink and had fun. And now am so drunk, i manage to know my way back home.
When I entered my house i was sitting on my sofa in my sitting room when my wife was coming down from the step,
and I dont won't her to know that I'm drunk so that we won't have another fight, I started operating my laptop, when she came closer to me she said "honey who are you trying to fool? I can see that you are really drunk!"
I quickly replied "look here woman I dont want your trouble this time around, because I won't tolerate any nonsense from you. Well as u can see, i'm only trying to do some office work on my system."
She said to me "I see, but why
are you typing on your briefcase"