Teatoe styles

19/09/2023

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16/07/2023

10/06/2023

“Memories are the key not to the past, but to the future.” ...

22/10/2022

It's my birthday,,happiest birthday Teatoe styles

12/10/2022

👶; Mom What is dick 🍆..?
👩; Sneakers 👟👟
👶; Okay what about pussy🍑..?
👩; Sandals 👡👡
👶; Okay Mom, What about fu***ng 🍆🍑💦..?
👩; It's another way of saying (Walking 🚶🚶)

(The next day visitors came)

👶; You're Most welcome ♥️ visitors 🤗
Visitors; thank you 😍😋
👶; Please 🙏 remove all your dicks 🍆🍆 and pussies🍑🍑 before you enter inside the house 🏡
Visitors; 😱😱 Why..?🤔
👶; They are dirty, You have been fu***ng along the road 😂😂

Please 🙏 don't lie to your kids 👶😂

FTeatoe stylesTeatoe stylesore_updates

03/10/2022

18/09/2022

ME-Teacher Niko na swali 😕
Teacher -uliza 😀
Me- How do u put an Elephant in a fridge😜?
Teacher- I don't know 😒
Me- it very easy u just open a fridge and u put elephant inside 😁
Teacher - okay 🙊
Me - And how do u put a donkey in a fridge😜?
teacher- very easy u just open the fridge and put a donkey inside 😀
Me- no u first remove the elephant and then u put a donkey😜
Teacher-ooohhh OK 🙆
Me -I have another question ..
Teacher - go on
Me- if all animal attends lion birthday party which animal will be missing and why 😜?
Teacher-all animals coz lion will eat them 😁
Me-no its a donkey coz it is still in the fridge😜
Teacher- u must be crazy😈🙆
Me- I'm not last question
Teacher - OK go on
Me- how will u cross a river with full of crocodile and there is no bridge ?
Teacher-.its not easy I will just use a boat ..
Me- No all the animals attended the lion birthday party crocodile must be there too u just swim across and go
Teacher - u fool get out of my class 🚶🚶 na hapo ndio masomo yangu iliishia

Please remember to follow my Page Teatoe styles

13/09/2022

My heart is broken because I don’t have money to sort my bills. I post it on fb seeking help, I get 2 likes n zero comment. So I send 100 messages to my contact list requesting for a loan of 15,000/. Sadly only 10ppl reply. 6 out of the 10 are claiming they can't help. The 4 who can help tell me ningoje waende bank kesho. Kesho mmoja ako mteja, the other 3 never pick my calls. So jioni imefika, my house door is locked. I have no where to sleep. I walk in the dark seeking options but sadly I meet goons. Fast forward the next day am found dead.
1500 people post on my wall how they knew me. How great I was. A committee is formed by my loyal friend. Friends contribute 200,000/- to feed guests at my funeral.
My staff team up and bring another 200k for coffin, tents and chairs.
I am buried in a coffin worth 15k but since they purchased it in a rush they meet a cartel who middle mans it and sells it at 45, 000/=.
Relatives meet again. It's a rare occasion for them to meet, so for my send off they collect an extra 350, 000/=.
Everyone wants to volunteer in order to appear they r helping. Youth print t-shirts with my image, each T-Shirt costs 1000/=. All the 400 youth pay, so the T-shirt man gets 20,000/- profit from my death.
Everyone wants to speak in my funeral. There is drama all over from people who never knew how I survived. Rumours fly how I was murdered by my friends. People blame my successful relative for having sacrificed me. Speeches are made on how talented I was. The few friends who supported me don't get a chance to speak in my funeral though they know the Truth. In fact they are prime suspects for my death.
If you can't stretch that helping hand to someone when they are alive please don't raise all this money when they are gone.
# dont show people Love when they are gone, show them when they need it and alive..
SHOW LOVE WHEN SOMEONE IS UP ABOVE THE SOIL NOT WHEN THEY ARE GONE DOWN😭😭

10/09/2022

Seven Facts About F***ing

1. F***ing twice a week
is good for your health.

2. F***ing gives proper relaxation for your mind
and body.

3. F***ing refreshes you.

4. After f***ing don't eat too much; go for more liquids.

5. When f***ing try to stay in bed because it can save you valuable energy.

6. F***ing can even reduce your cholesterol level.

7. F***ing makes you more committed and you can be sensitive and receive from above

SO REMEMBER - *FASTING* is good for your health.

May The Almighty cleanse your Dirty Mind if u were thinking of something else😹😹

Bless me with a FOLLOW may God bless you 💜💙🙏

10/09/2022

Unemployment is very deep. Firstly, the family looks at you in a certain way and they will make you feel it when the siblings or cousins who have 'made it' come around.

You have no say in family matters because you don't bring in anything, even your nieces and nephews don't respect you.

Friends don't even check on you because you're that 'unemployed friend' who's always asking for a favour. For a guy, naturally, you're a provider and if you can't, that kills you slowly inside - the feeling of inadequacy; you lose your dignity too.

There's nothing nice about that because each and every month comes with stress, then when you finally get that interview, you don't even have proper clothes to wear and sometimes you can't even go to that interview cause you don't have money; you've used up all your friends favours. Some even make comments like "You not looking hard enough" or "you are just lazy" not knowing that being unemployed is emotionally, financially and physically draining.

Help your unemployed friend where you can and I can assure you, he/she will never forget you. There's one thing about struggle or poverty - it is a great teacher!
Blessed weekend ahead

30/08/2022

ORDER!! ORDER!!