Silent Beads

21/12/2024

I received a call from my husband's side chick. She said, "Your husband is not the man you think he is."

It's amazing how side chicks think that they know our husbands more than we do. I dated my husband for four years before we got married and we've been married for over seven years with two kids. I've been through all the phases of life with him. When he had nothing because he was a fresh graduate. When he nearly died in an accident. When I nearly died in the labor ward and saw his eyes.

We've been through hardship, we've seen fear, we've seen happiness, we've seen indifference. I know how he would react in every situation. When he had his first side chick, I caught him. What didn't I know about my husband that a side chick from the outside would have to tell me?

I kept quiet and listened to her. She sounded disgruntled. She talked from pain. Her voice was shaky. I asked her, "What kind of man is my husband?"

She took in a deep breath before going on and on about the things my husband had done to her. She got pregnant for my husband and he forced her to get rid of it. According to her, my husband refused to pay the hospital bills afterward. She said she knew another lady my husband was dating. She concluded, "I'm telling you so you know who he truly is. He's sleeping around and will come home looking like an angel. He even told me you don't know how to dress..."

After everything, I asked her, "Why didn't you tell me all this when you first met him? You could have told me when he proposed to you, right? Why didn't you? Or you think you've found a treasure? Your treasure isn't treasuring?"

I was in the middle of another statement when I heard the tone of a dead line. She had dropped the line. When my husband came home, I told him what his side chick had said. I told him, "If you can't treat them well then why get them?"
He chuckled and walked away.

What we have is a ghost of a marriage. We look like a married couple because we live together and have kids. I don't remember the last time we touched each other. We sleep with a wall between us. He said he wanted a divorce but was too scared to make it happen. I'm still here because it serves my purpose. I have a place to sleep and have a man who pays for our existence.

I'm a nurse. I'm investing my money into traveling outside for a greener pasture. He doesn't know it. Not that I'm hiding it from him, he just doesn't care to know. I have a few weeks to go, maybe days. When I move, I'll ask my parents to proceed with the divorce. It will end so he can pursue women who know how to dress.

21/12/2024

My boyfriend only goes home once a year, usually in December. At the beginning of this year, I asked him about the future of our relationship. We agreed that he would take me home this December to meet his parents, and from there, we’d move forward. He insisted I couldn’t speak to them until I’d met them in person and they had approved of me.

I’ve been waiting all year for this. I even saved up money to buy my own ticket if necessary. In November, I asked him if we were still going. He told me it was possible his parents would come here for Christmas instead, so I should wait a little longer.

I trusted him and kept my hopes alive. But by early December, when I asked again, his response felt dismissive. “Why can’t you keep quiet and wait for me to bring it up? Must you ask me every minute?”

We met two summers ago. Both of us originally came here for school, and after graduating, we decided to settle here permanently. When he proposed, I accepted, and we moved in together. We share everything—there’s no “mine” or “yours,” just “ours.”

But I’ve seen how things play out here. Men live with you for years and then suddenly leave you for someone else, especially women from the Asian culture. That’s why I wanted clarity about our future early on. I want something permanent—or at least a clear path forward—but my boyfriend isn’t being straightforward.

As I write this, he’s in Ghana, and I’m still here. He didn’t take me with him or even inform me beforehand. One morning, he simply said, “I have to go alone because my parents aren’t in the right frame of mind to meet you.”

When he realized I was upset, he tried to pacify me by saying, “When I come back, we’ll marry here and inform them later. After that, we can go and see them.”

This is the same man who once said his parents’ approval of the woman he marries is extremely important to him. Now, he’s suggesting marrying me without their consent. Does that sound genuine to you?

I feel like letting go. In fact, I want to end things before he returns at the end of January. I believe he’s hiding something from me, and he’s not being honest in his dealings. Love is about the openness of the soul to each other. I've opened mine so wide but he can't leave his ajar for me.

Am I being too drastic? Should I give him more time? Or is it time to walk away?

21/12/2024

It’s December 21. What do you want for Christmas? Santa Claus is coming to town

20/12/2024

We met online and got married but couldn't have our happily ever after. Here's our story of heartbreaks, disappointments and divorce.

20/12/2024

Maybe the men could sense my need for them. I was probably too loud about it. They pretended to give me everything I wanted in the beginning but at some point, they start using their attention to manipulate me. “If you don’t do this, I won’t show up for you.” This kind of talk had me accepting whatever crumbs they gave me.

My father was alive when I was growing up but he chose not to be present in our lives. We knew where to find him but it didn’t change anything. …

20/12/2024

He responds to my messages too quickly, almost as if he has nothing else going on in his life and is always on his phone. Isn’t that a red flag?

20/12/2024

I threw myself carelessly into the pool and I was drowning. It looked shallow from where I was standing. Unbeknownst to me, that was the deepest end of the pool. I started fighting for my life though I didn't know how I was going to win over something that deep. I would sink low and throw myself up all the while screaming for help.

I remember when I was throwing myself in, my boyfriend was standing next to me, watching. While drowning, I hoped he was out there looking for help because he too didn't know how to swim. When I came up, I heard indistinct screams. Soon I would go down and the screams would drown with me. Loud voices became muffled while I was down there.

I was slowly losing my breath and losing hope of ever being rescued. I went down one more time and everything went quiet. My eyes were shut. The noise had calmed. The pool had won. All of a sudden, I felt a hand around my chest. It was trying to locate me. I didn't even have the strength to reach out and hold the hand. There was an embrace that slowly pulled me out of the water. I heard voices again. It was so loud.

"Is she alive?" A voice asked.

"Press her chest," one said.

"Where's the guy she came with, blow air into her mouth," another said.

I coughed. I coughed again and water started coming from my nose and mouth. I didn't see clearly. I felt like Lazarus when Jesus called him out of death. I saw faces. I was alive.

The guy who saved me was standing next to my boyfriend. He asked if I was alright. He gave me a towel and I asked his name. I thanked him and left the place with my boyfriend.

While in the Uber going home, my boyfriend asked, "Did you feel a finger down there while the guy was rescuing you?" I looked at him, shocked. "How would I know? I was drowning.”

"I didn't like how the guy handled you. His hand was in between your thighs while pulling you up. Couldn't he have held anywhere else?"

I put my head backwards, still hearing voices in my ears. He said, "Your mellons came out of your blouse, didn't he see it? That guy is of no good."

I could have been dead but all my boyfriend cared about was how the guy handled me while rescuing me. Days later, he was still talking about it. Weeks later, he was still grieving the way the guy handled me. I told him, "It looks like you'd rather bury me than bury your jealousy. What's all this noise about?"

He answered, "I won't be surprised if you enjoyed it, the reason you go mad anytime I talk about it."

This guy stopped me from attending a lecture by a particular lecturer because he thought the lecturer loved me. He fought a guy on my phone because the guy called me at night. He later blocked the guy. He pushed my girlfriends away because according to him, they were bad influence and were going to push me to a sugar daddy. I needed his permission to attend group studies because he thought the guys in the group would sn**ch me from him.

There were many signs of deep-rooted jealousy but I didn't leave him until he became obsessed with the hands that rescued me.

"You see, if I don't take care, one day I'll die and you won't allow the mortician to work on me. What's that? Was I born for you?" I told him.

This led to our final argument, I mean the argument that brought the relationship to an end. I was happy. I was relieved. I even wanted to start dating as soon as possible to feel how it was like to date a guy who wasn't jealous. And then he came back with his brother and later his mom. He's apologizing. He wants another run because according to him, he's no longer the same person.

I've blocked him. I've warned him to stay far away from me before I report him to the police. Currently, he doesn't come around. He sends emissaries. He won't have me again. I want to die someday and have a great mortician work on my body because I deserve to look good for the final mile to eternity.

20/12/2024

When we have to do anything in the relationship that involves money, I don’t leave it for him to pay for it alone. We sit down and calculate the cost we would incur. Then I contribute my part. I do this even when we go on dates. I don’t allow him to do it all on his own just because he is the man. No, we split the bill. I shower him with gifts too…

I have been dating Emos for the past four years. He is not financially stable but neither am I. That’s why I didn’t write him off when he first asked …

20/12/2024

I brought a man home to meet my mom, and the first thing she asked for was money. She asked the man to give her GHC2,000 to complete her building. Tonight on

19/12/2024

People who don’t know how I suffered call me a gold digger. They say I married him for his money. My question is, who in their right mind will see poverty and walk into it? Anyway, that's their business. Me, I am here being loved and spoiled like a princess. I am so happy I married this man.

Today I want to talk about women who leave good men. I am one of them. And sometimes I feel we are misunderstood. A man can give you the world …

19/12/2024

If you were given GHC1,000 for free right now, how much would you spend on your partner?

19/12/2024

She was seated behind me when a friend called. It was just a casual conversation, nothing serious or off-limits. We talked about random things, and at some point, the topic shifted to food. She asked me about my favourite food, and I answered without thinking much of it. That’s when I noticed my girlfriend squirming in her seat, clearly trying to get my attention.

As soon as I ended the call, she pounced. “Who was that, and why does she want to know your favourite food?” she demanded.

I didn’t think telling someone my favourite food was a big deal. It’s just normal human conversation—you talk about all sorts of things when you’re comfortable with someone. But my girlfriend didn’t see it that way. She started piecing together her own theories.

“Are you going to her place to eat?” she asked.
“No,” I replied.
“Are you two going somewhere that involves food?”
“No.”
“Is she a chef?”
“No.”
“Then why does she need to know your favourite food?”

No matter what I said, it didn’t make sense to her. She eventually concluded, “I’m not letting this slide. Call her back and let me ask why she wants to know about your favourite food.”

I refused—not because I had anything to hide, but because I didn’t want the unnecessary drama. I know my girlfriend and what she can say when she’s on the attack. The lady I spoke to was innocent and didn’t deserve to be interrogated. I stood my ground and hid my phone. I even raised my voice: “No! You’re not talking to her. If you don’t want me sharing my favourite food with people, fine—I won’t do it again.”

But now, here I am, labelled as a cheater who can’t be trusted. According to her, I’m a good-for-nothing man, and no woman should ever invest her trust in me. For almost a week now, she’s been giving me the cold shoulder. She still insists on talking to my friend to “get answers,” but I refuse to let that happen.

So, I’m asking: is it against the relationship code of ethics to talk about your favourite food with someone who isn’t your partner? Am I wrong for thinking this whole thing is completely blown out of proportion?

19/12/2024

He went on and on about how he came to Ghana because of me but I was leaving him stranded. His mother also called, “My son said he is stranded. Please give him the money if you have it.” I insisted I didn’t have it. The next thing I knew, I couldn’t reach Daniel anymore. His Facebook account was gone. His mother also blocked me. That was when I knew it was all a scam. My heart!

I had gotten to a place in my life where I was tired of disappointments in relationships. I wanted someone who would come into my life and stay with me. …

19/12/2024

I recorded my husband in bed with another woman and posted it online...

18/12/2024

I didn’t realize it when it started. Maybe because I was too busy with child care. By the time I noticed it, it had completely taken over my body. I’m talking about stretch marks.

I didn’t have this problem before I gave birth but now I can’t seem to find a solution for it. I feel someway when I look in the mirror.

Because of this, I feel shy when I am getting intimate with my man. I know stretch marks are natural and we should embrace our bodies but, mine isn’t those cute ones you can romanticize.

It’s really bad. That’s why I am here looking for help. By God’s grace, we will be tying the knot next year in March. I would be happy if I didn’t have these stretch marks by then. Does anyone here have a remedy they can recommend to me? It would mean so much to me.

18/12/2024

The mere thought that people didn’t know how to act around me burdened me. There were others who didn’t also know how to keep quiet. They called me awful names. Crocodile, maggot, among others. In the end, I decided to help everyone by covering the problem. Yes, I hid under the cover of long sleeves. In this climate!

I was born with lamellar ichthyosis. In case you haven’t heard of it, then you are one of the reasons I am here to share my story. People with lamellar …

18/12/2024

A bouquet of flowers cost GH₵500. Which one would you prefer as a gift, the bouquet or GH₵300 Momo?

18/12/2024

On our wedding day, I received a weird gift. It was a video. It was sent to my number during the wedding but I didn’t see it until much later. My maid of honor whose number was on the invitation also received the same video. There was a man and a woman in the video doing their thing. The man was my husband.

On our wedding day, I received a weird gift. It was a video. It was sent to my number during the wedding but I didn’t see it until much later. …