09/05/2022
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom.” —Viktor Frankl
If you wrote this quote as a formula, it might look like this: S( )R.
This week, I’m celebrating 26 years of sobriety. Before I got sober, there was no space at all between the S and the R. Something happened, someone did or said something, and I’d come out swinging or fearing or worrying or apologizing. I responded in a way that led to more stacked stimuli and responses. There was very little growth and very little freedom.
I’ve learned to pry open that space over the past 26 years. Breath, curiosity, better sleep, working out, intention, therapy, prayer—I’ve learned to practice what Buddhists call the sacred pause.
But the past two years have taken a toll, and now it’s time for a serious recommitment to creating and maintaining space. For me, this includes a three-month sabbatical, a break in podcasting and social media, and making sure our team takes time away. You can read more on the website.
In one of the best speeches I’ve ever heard, actress, screenwriter, director, and producer Michaela Coel said, “Do not be afraid to disappear, from it, from us, for a while and see what comes to you in the silence.” I’m a big fan of silence. I can’t wait!
We set audacious goals in our organization—like “Start global conversations about shame and vulnerability”—but this might be our boldest move yet.
We’ll be back this fall. Rested and ready for our next audacious goal.
Stay awkward, brave, and kind,
BB
P.S. The stimulus/response quote has a long and unknown history. We know it’s not Stephen Covey (per him). Many scholars think it’s Viktor Frankl. You can read more in the post on brenebrown.com.
https://brenebrown.com/articles/2022/05/09/creating-space/
