Healing from Cancer and Narcissistic Abuse

05/08/2024

Hi friends, it's been a while. I have just uploaded this video to discuss the red flags that I saw in my relationship with the narcissist. This is the first video, many more will come. If you have any questions, please leave them in the comment section. I will answer them. Thank you

08/07/2024

A red flag to look out for is when someone tells you they don’t regret their actions even if it was a wrong decision. That might be a narcissist right there telling you they don’t have the capability to self-reflect. A normal person will have some sense of regret if they’ve done something wrong or they’ve taken a wrong decision but a narcissist does not have the ability to sit with themselves and reflect. My ex said this so many times and I just thought it was okay not to regret one’s decisions. Alas, he is a narcissist who cannot reflect internally.

02/07/2024

To my ex's new supply. You are welcome to Egypt. A part of me feels sorry for you because you are just in your twenties,reminding me of myself when I was your age. However, you are also an enabler,, a destroyer and a flying monkey. By the time you realise what had hit you, your physical health will probably be on the decline. In your next life, you will choose better. What makes a girl in her mid-twenties go for a divorced man in his forties? Don't you have a mother? Where are the elders in your family? Why are they not asking questions? Okay o.

15/06/2024

The narcissist I encountered is the golden child in his family. In hindsight, I understand that his mother is also a narcissist who raised a worse monster than her. She absolutely spoilt and enabled all his bad behaviour from childhood till he grew up. From the stories he told me, his father did not really like him and even doubted his paternity. This was because he suspected his mum of infidelity when she was pregnant with him 🤯🤯.

06/06/2024

Dear narcissist, you are very scared of me not telling my children the truth about you. Listen to me, this is exactly why I have decided to share my truth with them and anybody that cares to listen. You are a pathological liar who tricked me into marrying him, when you saw that I was in love with you, you devalued me so much that I lost my self-esteem, my core essence. And each time I got pregnant, you abandoned me and went to your other side pieces and even had the audacity to discuss me with them. My body started resenting you but because of the way our society has conditioned women, I continued to allow you to drag me along in your miserable life. This continued for 9 years when my body could not take it anymore due to the constant chemical imbalance in the body, panic attacks, walking on eggshells, constantly intimidating me, belittling, devaluing and degrading. Oh, you tortured me emotionally, you stressed me. I could not understand how I went from being everyone's sweetheart to being a complete rag in your hands. You and your mother bullied me into silence, you made me believe I was the one with the problem, not knowing it was your mother that did a poor job of raising you, she birthed and raised a monster just like her. Therefore, I will do better with my own kids. I will tell them the truth about you, they will see it anyway because the truth will always be the truth.

01/06/2024

My ex- mother in law did this. She would make stew, soup and fried meat for her narcissistic son. The one she spoilt and damaged emotionally thinking she was showing him love. Ma, you failed woefully as a mother🤮🤮

25/05/2024

I'm at this stage right now. Sometimes I'm fine, at other times,I just feel very angry at how the narcissist and his family hid their sneaky and slimy ways. I'm angry at myself for being so naive, and trusting them.

25/05/2024

A narcissist wants you dead.
Period!

24/05/2024

A root cause of chronic diseases like cancer is stress. A root cause of stress is emotional pain. Get out of that toxic relationship. The narcissist will not change, run for your dear life.

19/05/2024

I’m struggling today with emotions. Bad memories rushing in. Oh, I prayed, I fasted, prayeddddd for a mad man all these years. God, how did I get here?? How did I get so deceived?

19/05/2024

Going through another wave of anger today. Angry at the man that lied to me for years without the fear of God and angry at myself for believing him so blindly. I believed I was the one with the problem, I believed he loved me and had my interest at heart, I believed I had to be his doormat, I believed all his lies. I wonder what took me so long to realise he's a demon without a soul sent by the devil himself.

18/05/2024

Trust me, I asked questions. When I asked him if he was baptised or not, he said no and then quickly added that he could do that if it would make me feel comfortable. Was I not supposed to know that something was wrong? No, I never suspected he was just trying to mirror me. He got baptised, started attending church on Sundays and we even started sharing notes after church service. Later, he started attending my church which was initially a concern for me. He had told me he was a worker in church and belonged to the Protocol Unit in the Redeemed Christian Church of God that he attended. How he was suddenly able to leave his Church and started attending mine was a slight concern for me because that showed that he wasn't rooted in that church. However, he told me he wanted to be close to God and wanted a wife that would bring him close to God. Kindly note that he told me from the beginning of the relationship that he wanted to marry me. He came across as someone that was serious and knew what he wanted in life. I did not know this was just a facade and a trap to make me fall for him.
He started attending my church and another red flag that I noticed was that he did not know even simple church songs. For someone that belonged to a unit in Church, this was just weird. I would look at him from the choir stand, and just wonder if i was doing the right thing. My gut feeling was that he was hiding something but each time I asked him about anything, there was a ready answer. He knew what to say to make me brush things off.
He knew he was not up to my standard and he tried very hard to 'rebrand' himself. I was more fashionable than him and i remember that this caused tension between us alot in the early days. I did not like his taste in fashion and I made it clear. My sister told me to take things easy with him seeing clearly that he was behind me in different ways. I remember buying clothes for him just to make him look 'posh'. The fact that I finished from a private university made him feel inferior to me for a very long time! I believe this was his number one insecurity.
Our values did not align and I did not see that because he hid his behaviour. He is a covert narcissist and after 16 years, I realised he's a master at telling lies and manipulation.

18/05/2024

I was a young Christian girl, just finished from University and had started working. I had my life planned out in front of me just like many of us. Boom, the narcissist appeared. I can't remember him asking me to be his girlfriend, all I know is we started dating after about three months. He was very nice and caring. I remember him driving me everywhere I wanted to go in Lagos hairdressers, tailor's, church, work anywhere. He told me he wanted to be a part of my life, wanted to know everyone close to me. The first red flag was when he sent a Facebook message to my closest at the time, introducing himself as my new friend! I was angry, like wait for me to do the introduction. We were not even dating at the time, why the urgency? Apparently, that's the way of the narcissists. They just want to entwine themselves into your very soul.
In retrospect, my intuition did not trust him but he manipulated his way into my life. At this point in my life, I had not met anybody that was good at lying and manipulating others. Therefore, I was fooled into believing that he was genuinely being kind to me and loved me. Oh, how wrong I was!
My mother single handedly sent me to one of the foremost private universities in Nigeria, I finished with a second class upper and was firmly grounded in my Christian values. Also, as young as I was, I worked in a Bank which was a big deal at that time. Apparently, these were what he saw in me which I did not even see as a big deal. I was just living and trying to improve my life. He was intimidated by my essence and looked for a way to pe*****te me further. Guess what he did? He lied that he was a Christian! This happened in 2008 and I just got to know the truth in 2024. He knew that was a deal breaker for me because I was unashamedly a Christian, became born again at age 15, lived for God, was in the Church Choir etc. Therefore, I would not have anything to to with someone who wasn't a Christian.

14/05/2024

Narcissists are master manipulators.

14/05/2024

I forgive myself for not listening to my soul when I met the narcissist.

13/05/2024

03/05/2024

Young girls, flee from a narcissist. If you are not yet married to him, don’t look back.

03/05/2024

Marrying a narc is an extreme sport. His enablers ie his mother and siblings will all pretend not to know how you’ve been suffering. And now, they pretend not to know that he has married a 25 year old girl. What life do people live? How do they sleep at night?

03/05/2024

Today is the day that i have decided to say my truth. Enough of being the good girl. I take my healing in my hand.