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Piers Morgan To Star In Lead Role For Baby Reindeer Season 2
12/05/2024

Piers Morgan To Star In Lead Role For Baby Reindeer Season 2

Netflix has announced that Piers Morgan will replace Richard Gadd as the lead star in season 2 of Baby Reindeer. Fans have been clamouring for a sequel to the surprise smash hit and after Pi…

X-Men '97 DoA Due to Lack of T&A
24/03/2024

X-Men '97 DoA Due to Lack of T&A

“The theft of Rogue’s cakes should be considered a war crime,” is a statement which has been repeated frequently in the last few months. The sentiment is a popular one, having been echoed in…

Elon Musk has been caught inserting potato chips into Neuralink volunteers' heads. The business mogul and father of 43 b...
21/02/2024

Elon Musk has been caught inserting potato chips into Neuralink volunteers' heads. The business mogul and father of 43 began Neuralink as a neuroprosthetics and advanced brain-computer interface company, to massage his own overinflated ego and inflict misery on us for eternity by vying to achieve immortality. After first testing the chips on monkeys, which were found to be incompatible with the experiment as their IQ's were higher than Musk's, Neuralink moved onto human victims....

Elon Musk has been caught inserting potato chips into Neuralink volunteers’ heads. The business mogul and father of 43 began Neuralink as a neuroprosthetics and advanced brain-computer inter…

Vaush Receives Standing Ovation From Oxford Union For PDFile Speech
19/02/2024

Vaush Receives Standing Ovation From Oxford Union For PDFile Speech

After leftist YouTuber Vaush accidentally opened a file of questionable po*******hy on a livestream to his audience, which featured images of young-looking women and horses engaging in abomination…

Dragon Ball Z Fan Doesn't Realise Show Ended Thirty Years Ago
09/02/2024

Dragon Ball Z Fan Doesn't Realise Show Ended Thirty Years Ago

Scott Braun, 38, believes his theory concerning series protagonist Goku’s heart failure during the Android Saga of Dragon Ball Z to be compelling stuff, and has devoted more than a week of h…

George R.R. Martin FINALLY Finishes 'The Winds of Winter'
07/02/2024

George R.R. Martin FINALLY Finishes 'The Winds of Winter'

lol psych

Man Discovers Palworld is Not a New Personality Trait
04/02/2024

Man Discovers Palworld is Not a New Personality Trait

A man has been shocked to discover that Palworld is not a new personality trait. The open world RPG was released last month and Keith, 32, has not shut up about it. “Come on, it’s Poke…

Ben Shapiro Loses Honorary African American Membership
04/02/2024

Ben Shapiro Loses Honorary African American Membership

Yeah, nah, he fu**ed it.

Ben Shapiro Embraced As Honorary African American.
04/02/2024

Ben Shapiro Embraced As Honorary African American.

After teaming up to perform a rap with Tom MacDonald, the conservatives’ answer to Drake, Taylor Swift, and the milkiest of toast all wrapped into one, Daily Wire frontman Ben Shapiro has be…

Jordan Peterson Releases New Book: 12 Rules For Remaining Employed
04/02/2024

Jordan Peterson Releases New Book: 12 Rules For Remaining Employed

“Professor” Jordan Peterson, the world’s foremost cosplayer of DC’s character Two-Face, has released a new book: 12 Rules For Remaining Employed. Ahead of his appeal to the College of Psycho…

United Kingdom Redirects Migrants and Asylum Seekers from Rwanda to Gaza
04/02/2024

United Kingdom Redirects Migrants and Asylum Seekers from Rwanda to Gaza

Following accusations of racism levied against the Conservative Party over the controversial policy of transporting migrants to Rwanda, Home Secretary James Cleverly has announced the politi…

6 Signs Your Boyfriend Wishes You Were Never Born
02/02/2024

6 Signs Your Boyfriend Wishes You Were Never Born

Do you ever find yourself wondering if your boyfriend secretly hates you? Well, he probably does. And these are the 6 warning signs that he 100% wishes you were never born. He Asks You to Repeat Y…

First Neuralink User Logged Out Of Brain Due To Payment Issue
02/02/2024

First Neuralink User Logged Out Of Brain Due To Payment Issue

Neuralink User Pairs Device With X and Becomes A Bigot
02/02/2024

Neuralink User Pairs Device With X and Becomes A Bigot

The first Neuralink user to pair his human-to-computer interfacing device to X has become a bigot, research finds. Neuralink, designed as the next step in the human brain’s interaction with …

Mr Beast Helps 1000 Gamers Touch Grass For The First Time!
01/02/2024

Mr Beast Helps 1000 Gamers Touch Grass For The First Time!

Pulling off his grandest stunt yet, popular YouTuber Mr Beast has seemingly accomplished the impossible by helping 1000 gamers go outside and touch grass for the first time. The world’s most…

Hackers Discover Vaporeon Inspired Romantic Partner In Palworld Files
01/02/2024

Hackers Discover Vaporeon Inspired Romantic Partner In Palworld Files

Sly hackers have discovered what appears to be a Vaporeon inspired character while snooping around in Palworld’s files. The file in question, named Vaporomanceopt.palw, suggests that a character i…

High Court Rules Laurence Fox a 'Wa**er'
31/01/2024

High Court Rules Laurence Fox a 'Wa**er'

A high court ruling today has declared that actor Laurence Fox (45, exhaustingly divorced) is, in nearly every context, a wa**er. “It doesn’t really matter in which light you examine him,” s…

Sir Keir Starmer Donates All His Shoes To Charity
30/01/2024

Sir Keir Starmer Donates All His Shoes To Charity

Leader of the Opposition Sir Keir Starmer has made another fawning attempt to win favour with the electorate this week. In an effort to have somebody, anybody approve of him, Starmer decided to do…

Man's New Year's Resolution to 'Be Better' Makes Him Better Than Everyone Else
15/01/2024

Man's New Year's Resolution to 'Be Better' Makes Him Better Than Everyone Else

In December 2022 Chris Hampton was an unremarkable man living in Farncombe, Surrey. Following a comment made in his local pub regarding his lifestyle, Chris determined to make changes in the…

Gyatt announced as Word of the Year
29/12/2023

Gyatt announced as Word of the Year

Goodsmith’s Dictionary has announced that this year’s word of the year is Gyatt. The word, popular with generation Z and Alpha, refers to a person that is well endowed in the buttocks area. Gyatt …

Rise And Grind Pays Off! LinkedInfluencer Finally Gets That 0.5% Pay Rise! [It's Compulsory]
18/12/2023

Rise And Grind Pays Off! LinkedInfluencer Finally Gets That 0.5% Pay Rise! [It's Compulsory]

This is a breaking news story. A LinkedInfluencer has shocked the nation by finally getting the pay rise they were grinding for. Miles Rakes, a popular poster on the job website LinkedIn, shared t…

Nigel Farage Confirmed To Join Love Island 2024
05/12/2023

Nigel Farage Confirmed To Join Love Island 2024

Nigel Farage, to the excitement of the nation, is joining Love Island 2024 as a contestant – we can finally confirm. ITV bosses say that since Nigel’s boom in popularity due to his sti…

J.K Rowling Announces New Book: Harry Potter And The Scourge Of Wokery
05/12/2023

J.K Rowling Announces New Book: Harry Potter And The Scourge Of Wokery

JK Rowling has released a new Harry Potter Book: Harry Potter and the Scourge of Wokery. Set many years after Voldermort’s defeat, it focuses on an adult Harry fighting against the Wizarding…

Boris Johnson Joins The Black Hole
05/12/2023

Boris Johnson Joins The Black Hole

Renowned children’s rugby player and one-time prime minister Boris Johnson will be joining the fledgling news site The Black Hole, according to a factually-challenged source (me). Johnson is best …

Keir Starmer Praises Asteroid That Killed The Dinosaurs
04/12/2023

Keir Starmer Praises Asteroid That Killed The Dinosaurs

In an attempt to woo human voters ahead of the general election, Keir Starmer has thrown his support behind the asteroid that caused the extinction of the dinosaurs some 65 million years ago. Writ…

I Think, Therefore I Am? (an artist)
04/12/2023

I Think, Therefore I Am? (an artist)

An AI “Artist” is furious that people won’t stop laughing at him. Hacker69420 – or Peter to his friend – is absolutely livid that the artistic community will not accept his offerings, no mat…

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