The Adventures of Donald McQueen

29/04/2024

News from Noxford. Professor Donald McQueen is at work on the second volume of his Adventures, which are due to begin publication in fascicles later this year, or perhaps next ... Will he uncover the truth about the Codex Assinorum? Why is the greatest obstacle to his success now Johannes Rotten and the Bibliography Pistols? What is the truth about the sad fate of Minerva Columba (the Sweet Dove) and the part played in that fate by the evil Cornelius Bunce? The answers are: wait and see, wait and see, and wait and see respectively ...

20/05/2023

06/11/2021

The twelve magnificent chapters of the first volume of The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer, are now available via Facebook Podcasts ... 'Straordinary! Professor McQueen is currently scouring the world for copies of the Codex Assinorum, pursued by the foul fiend (Cornelius Bunce), who has begun a campaign to steal his research, following the collapse of his own study of Aboriginal dung-pellets, which have turned out to be entirely made up. He is writing the second volume of his Adventures as he goes ... but when it will be ready for the press is anyone's guess. In the meantime, the motion-picture of volume I is in production in Hollywood, with Mr George Clooney in the leading role. He is said to be just like Professor McQueen (but less handsome)!

05/04/2021

Out now! The final chapter of the first volume of The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer! Like the final fascicle of one of Dickens' part-works, this is a double number – twice as long, and twice as hilarious, as chapter 1 ... Nobody is funnier than McQueen. So I recommend you listen to nobody! Parental Advisory: While this chapter contains some strong language ("gracious!" and "woopsie!" for example), it also includes a savage tale (of the seven old ladies locked in the laboratory), which may be, like Murdoch's Plutonium Blend, too dark and strong for some stomachs. For now, farewell from Donald McQueen!
https://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/8269187

01/03/2021

This day is published. Chapter 11 of the Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer! Professor McQueen returns to Timor Mortis College, Noxford, and muses on the history of that "City of leaning spires and ghostly biscuits", before encountering the strange gods, tragedies and robots of Noxford. Cherrytop the Sarcastic Horse again fails to put in an appearance, but Elton John turns up at the last moment ...
https://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/8043536

01/02/2021

Published today, the tenth fascicle of The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer! Professor McQueen is missing his cat, so decides to leave the Duodecimo Club (in London's Bibliography Quarter) and return to his lodgings at Timor Mortis College, Noxford. But on the train he meets his nemesis, the worst man in the world, the organizer of half that is evil and nearly all that is undetected in the city of books, the Napoleon of Bibliographical Crime!
https://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/7590301

01/02/2021

A snippet from chapter X of The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer!

04/01/2021

This day is published, Chapter 9 of "The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer!" Join the Professor as he wrestles with a vast moral problem, and pops off into space again ... The quest for the truth regarding the "Codex assinorum" of Scrotus continues apace! But where is Cherrytop the Sarcastic Horse?

https://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/7122229

07/12/2020

Chapter VIII of The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer, is published today. Who is the cruel and mysterious Mr Lavender, and what has he got to do with the greatest bibliographical mystery of this or any other age? Professor McQueen received complaints that the two previous chapters contained too little music, so this chapter is full of the stuff. You can sing along ...
https://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/6698740

02/11/2020

This day is published! Chapter VII of The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer! Professor McQueen continues his sojourn at the Duodecimo Club in Pall Mall, where he just misses the opportunity to meet Death in person. Who will be the next President of the Bibliographical Society? How could a Scottish music teacher possibly be misunderstood by the girls of Whittering's School in Hampshire? What is the mysterious accent employed by Dr Chopper Hopper aboard the Starship Venus? Will any of the Club members ever speak to Joanna Lumley again? Enquire within for the answers to some of these questions.
https://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/6173866

Professor McQueen continues his sojourn at the Duodecimo Club in Pall Mall, where he just misses the opportunity to meet Death in person. Who will be the next President of the Bibliographical Society? How could a Scottish music teacher possibly be...

05/10/2020

Available now in all good podcast-shops (free, of course), Chapter VI of the Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer, entitled "The Backside of the Moon". Why? Well, why not? Professor McQueen arrives at his London club, patronized by the cream of the world's bibliographers, The Duodecimo Club, where he meets some old friends and Joanna Lumley, before being sucked again into another absurd episode of the 1970s TV science-fiction masterpiece "The Venus Probe" ... Be warned. These are dangerous penguins!
https://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/6173866

Professor McQueen arrives at the London club patronized by the cream of the world's bibliographers, The Duodecimo Club, where he meets some old friends and Joanna Lumley, before being sucked again into another absurd episode of the 1970s TV scienc...

21/09/2020

Here's a little music from Chapter 5 ... https://soundcloud.com/paul-westcott-nash/albertostheme

This piece was largely improvised, to form background music in an episode of the spoof sci-fi series The Venus Probe, in The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer! It begins with the ship's orc

07/09/2020

This day is published – Chapter V of The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer! Want to know how to commit the perfect murder, or bake the perfect Victoria sponge? No? Frankly who does? You will find none of that rubbish in McQueen's adventures. No, his story is full of other rubbish!

In this month's fascicle, Professor McQueen tries to leave Timor Mortis College for his London club, in search of a little peace in order to continue his researches into the Codex Assinorum. But he is waylaid by a series of real and spectral visions, and gets caught up in an absurd episode of the 1970s television series The Venus Probe ...

03/08/2020

In the ancient University town of Noxford (which is definitely not Oxford), Donald McQueen is Professor Emeritus of Bibliography and a Fellow of both Timor Mortis College and Unrewley House. McQueen's adventures begin one morning when he finds the ear-trumpet of Death in the anteroom of the Fellows....

03/08/2020

Published today, "Fisticuffs on the Steps of the British Museum", chapter four of The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer!
https://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/

In the ancient University town of Noxford (which is definitely not Oxford), Donald McQueen is Professor Emeritus of Bibliography and a Fellow of both Timor Mortis College and Unrewley House. McQueen's adventures begin one morning when he finds the ear-trumpet of Death in the anteroom of the Fello...

06/07/2020

The third chapter of The Adventures is published today! All Professor McQueen's students must attend ... Happy listening to "Harry Potter and the Cardigan of Doom!"

http://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/4307834-harry-potter-and-the-cardigan-of-doom

26/06/2020

The next chapter of the Adventures will be published on 6 July. In the meantime, fans of Professor McQueen will be horrified to see him in the flesh, in lockdown!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lR_wS5w0vBk&t=2s

Professor Donald McQueen, in lockdown at Timor Mortis College, takes a moment to speak to his disciples, and to read an extract from the introduction to his ...

02/06/2020

This day is published – Chapter Two of The Adventures of Donald McQueen, Bibliographer! ... No Quarter for the Blue Menace!

https://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/

In the ancient University town of Noxford (which is definitely not Oxford), Donald McQueen is Professor Emeritus of Bibliography and a Fellow of both Timor Mortis College and Unrewley House. McQueen's adventures begin one morning when he finds the ear-trumpet of Death in the anteroom of the Fello...

16/05/2020

04/05/2020

Here is the link to the Adventures!
https://www.buzzsprout.com/1038544/

In the ancient University town of Noxford (which is definitely not Oxford), Donald McQueen is Professor Emeritus of Bibliography and a Fellow of both Timor Mortis College and Unrewley House. McQueen's adventures begin one morning when he finds the ear-trumpet of Death in the anteroom of the Fello...

04/05/2020

In the ancient University town of Noxford (which is definitely not Oxford), Donald McQueen is Professor Emeritus of Bibliography and a Fellow of both Timor Mortis College and Unrewley House. McQueen's adventures begin one morning when he finds the ear-trumpet of Death in the anteroom of the Fellows’ Library at his College, and discovers its miraculous power to eavesdrop upon any time or place, any reality, and to hear even the thoughts of the people and animals around him. All the while, he continues his greatest adventure, his quest to uncover the truth about the mysterious Codex Assinorum, which has caused bibliographers so many sleepless hours, and broken teeth.

This is a comical adventure for bibliographers, who will complain that there is too little bibliography in it, while non-bibliographers (the benighted majority) will complain that there is too much. Rest assured that the next chapter will contain more, or less, bibliographical humour ...

03/05/2020

03/05/2020