10/01/2026
SOBS V TOFFEES
Shall we score a pen for you?
Shall we sco-o-ore a pen for you?
In very un-Sunderland fashion, the Lads won a penalty shootout 3-0 against England's top penalty stopper, with Le Fee banging the first in and O'Nien blasting in the third. We'd gone ahead with Enzo's clever goal at 1pm then were pegged back as the ref's game disintegrated on 75 minutes and he gave Everton the softest of penalties with three to go. Mind, we were by far the better team (words of an Evertonian, not me) and should have had it wrapped up in normal time but hey - it's the FA Cup and we love a bit of drama.
At last a Saturday game, so when the alarm went off I actually knew what day it was - unlike Wednesday, which I thought was Saturday. Still, a decent run down, but the early kickoff meant no tour of the city centre. The AFCON results meant no early return for Talbi and Diarra, but Sadiki was available.
We spotted our first purple wheely bins as warnings of the wind off the Mersey being a notorious feature at the Hill Dicky came in from my local contact, then had a tour of the docks before finding a parking spot two thirds of a mile from the ground in an area that smelled of paint and chemicals.
Access to the Star Wars stadium was easy, the stairs not so - but that's the fault of my knees, not Everton - meaning a view through the those knees from a great height. Glad I was in the sun, as it was properly Baltic otherwise, and look, I know Everton bill themselves as a traditional club (which they are) but the pre-match music was a bit... oompah. Never mind, no harm done, and I do like the Z Cars tune anyway.
Roefs
Hume O'Nien Mukiele Cirkin
Xhaka (c) Sadiki
Adingra Le Fee Mundle
Mayenda .. and a bench of Patterson, Hjelde, Alderete, Neil, Brobbey, Geertruida, Rigg, Isidor, and Ballard.
Thankfully in our stripes as opposed to Everton who were trying out their new black outfit (much to the relief of those wearing our blue shirts), we faced the 7,700+ Mackems who were out to have a grand day out and, after we gave Pickers a good clap, they kicked off.
The first couple of minutes were light-hearted Everton pressure, then we got up the field and almost made the crucial breakthrough when Mundle danced into to box and Mayenda almost picked up the pieces. A minute later a low one in from the right brought a cheeky back heel from Sadiki that was cleared.
Very promising stuff; Everton were restricted to a couple of blasts from distance, the first slashed wildly wide and the second a foot over. Strangely, only three frees were awarded in the opening twenty minutes, and all to us. One we didn't get left Cirkin with a head injury which handily stopped an Everton attack, making the home fans very happy. Not. Anyway, Roefs cleverly (or inadvertently - you choose) exacted revenge by splattering their man while taking a high ball a minute later.
Just before the half hour, a trademark Nordi throw from the right caused the usual havoc, and Mayenda calmly laid it off to Enzo on the edge of the box towards our left, and the sidefoot volley back across and into the side gave Pickers no chance.
Wednesday's abberation forgiven? Whyaye. Boom - up for the cup!
Four minutes of mostly controlled stuff from us brought a free about 25 out on the left, and when it was cleared Cirkin whacked it back to bring a fine save from Pickers. After Everton dragged a shot from their left across and wide we won another corner after a run by Mundle. It went out to the edge, from where O9 headed goalwards only to see it glance off a blue/home head and out for a corner. Xhaka took the dead ball, it fell for Nordi with his back to goal and his overhead kick was cleared.
Good stuff, Lads - surely a second goal was on the cards and it nearly came when Mundle cut inside and Pickford had to pull off a top save down to his left to palm it away. Three added minutes brought more Sunderland pressure but we only had a Sadiki yellow to show for it.
A goal to the good at half time, and well worth it.
No changes for the second period, and Everton came at us but we protected Roefs well before we began to get forward more. Ten minutes in Mundle lost his rag after being pushed over again, but calmed himself down and chased back to rob Dibling, who was trying to be a bit too clever. Just after the hour we burst down the middle and Enzo fed Mayenda but he was forced left and the shot flashed across the goal and wide.
Hume possibly got away with one in our box, but the Toffee had hold of him as well so nothing was given. Roefs collected rather than saved a high shot, then with twenty to go we made changes.
Off went Mayenda and Adingra, in came Ballard and Brobbey, but the forward play came from the home side - thankfully they'd struggle to hit a cow's arse with a handful of gravel, and Roefs just watched as a shot, then a header, flew harmlessly over the top.
As we entered the final ten the ref went a bit loopy, awarding frees that weren't and ignoring ones that were. Some clever play down the left set up Cirkin but his blast was a yard too high. Then came the crucial moment, with three to go. Their man jinked into the box, possibly handling it as he did so, bumped our man's shoulder, and threw himself down.
Penalty, said Mr Dafty, and it was duly squeezed between our keeper's left hand and the post. Boo.
Four added minutes in which all we got was a Ballard card for a non-foul, then it was normal time up. That seemed to baffle the Evertonians in the posh seats, as many of them disappeared.
Mundle, who somehow kept going despite looking paggered, had two shots saved as Pickford earned his corn. Still 1-1 at the turnaround, we replaced Brobbey with Isidor, which was a bit of a surprise, and judging by the number of times an Everton player went down with cramp we were a lot fitter than them. Hume was carded for a crude dunsh to end an attack (taking one for the team, I believe it's called), then we settled ourselves to try and win it.
We screamed at Xhaka to shoot, so he did and Pickford went to his right to save, with the ball flying the other way but wide. Two to go, that goal would have been deserved. We set Issy away on a run into the box, but there were too many Toffee legs to get through, then Mundle shot over.
Penalties, Everton were first up.
Down went Roefs to his right to save. Ahahaha!
Enzo was next. As we chanted his name, Pickford consulted his water bottle but decided against standing still with arms aloft and le magicien planted his right foot shot firmly to the keeper's left. Gerrup!
Carbon copy save by Roefs. Wow.
Captain Granit next, and he disguised his left-footed shot into the same side as Enzo. Yeehah!
Roefs down to his left for their third - and he got there. Marvellous. Is this really us?
Up stepped Luke. Score and we're through, and there were few, if any, of us who expected anything other than a blast. Pickford's water bottle probably read "don't get in the way or you'll be in the net with it." Hard, high, straight down the middle and into to back of the net.
Cue mayhem mixed with disbelief in the stands as 7,700+ Mackems went ballistic, screaming, laughing, and generally enjoying the moment.
Magic.
Man of the Match? Sadiki was everywhere, Hume and Cirkin were solid at the back with both producing thunderous tackles, and useful going forward. Mundle was a great outlet, and while some bemoaned his final ball, he did force Pickford into two big saves. Xhaka was Xhaka, Luke did fine, and it would have gone to Le Fee, who showed remarkable energy as well as clever football, but... you don't save three penalties in a shootout and not get MOTM.
Nice one, Rooooofs. Tell me ma, me ma...
