jobandknockpodcast

Trade stories, podcasts, tools, tech, tips and tricks and banter from the guys over U-Scribe Jig

31/12/2023

The king of plugs and sockets 🇬🇧
Rule Britannia! Britannia rules the sockets? We may of lost a few things over the years but one thing we bloody do have is the best and safest design when it comes to plugs and sockets
EU! pfff they just keep falling out and American? god damn, you might as well just stick your fingers on the damn holes and have done with
Truly inspiring British engineering at its best…..even if it is just a plug and socket!
“Nostra potestas melior est quam tua”

12/10/2023

⚠️ WARNING ⚠️
Do not use this guy, I had him round to paint the whole house while I was away on holiday
I walked in and it was all yellow
He must be sick of hearing it 😂😂
I’ll get my coat and see myself out
#😂

20/08/2023

Can you find the snake?
Happy Sunday, harder than it looks but it’s in there….. 🐍
Winner get 78.5 Instagram points, and hell I’ll even Chuck in 54.82 tik tok points whilst I’m at it
Good luck

01/07/2023

“80’s movies” - Only 5 can survive, which ones are you keeping
Put your 5 in the comments….GO
Tougher than picking your favourite child

13/04/2023

“Right then let’s get serious”
Down tools and pay some serious attention, forget pricing, forget ordering materials this is the serious question….
What brew? What sandwich and what cake?
I’ll start it off - C1E

05/03/2023

Impressed? Or disgusted? I think I’m both…
It shouldn’t happen but it did, it shouldn’t of been tiled but it was, the effort that went in to that is insane. But here we are looking at it……unsure why, unsure how, but 50% goes. Well done. 50% goes WTF
Anyway it’s Sunday so comment if you want, or dont, or share it with a tiler or plumber, or dont, Instagram doesn’t like us dirty tradesthey/thems anyway

10/08/2022

Tag a painter you know who would love wearing this new fashion statement from
First balenciaga sold a hi vis and work boots, now this….us trades always we’re ahead of the curve

31/07/2022

Be a real man, measure twice cut once and still get it wrong
The tape measure is broken surely, I’m sure it was 101 not 110?
We’ve all been there hands up 🙌🏻

30/07/2022

World News : Price rises, Material costs, gas and electricity hikes, inflation put strain on people everywhere, How are you coping / managing these unrealistic costs
Carpenters : 💀🪦☠️

12/05/2022

Smoother than I ever did?
This image and pun is brilliant, it makes me think what others there are?
What music song title and trade puns can you think of?
AC/DC, Oasis, The Beatles? Mixed with plumbing? Joinery? Tiling?
Put yours in the comments below ✏️

28/04/2022

Houses of pornament?
Not only are they pulling our pants down, they’re literally doing it in plain sight now
To be fair back in the day many workplaces walls were covered in page 3 models and topless calendars…..don’t think that would fly these days

28/03/2022

Will sparkies ever clean up their mess….there’s only one thing for it!
Send in Will smith!
Tag your sparky mates who need a will slap 👋🏻

27/02/2022

If you know you know
“Just watch me”
“Don’t do it this way at college”
“The instructions are wrong”
“We do it this way don’t worry about that way”

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13/02/2022

Can you spot the phone?
1.6 million internet Instagram points to the winners…..

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😍 ☺ ❤️

11/01/2022

Episode 13 - Derek Barrett design
What’s happeinnn we’re back with a bang for 2022 with a podcast from a well known man in the cabinetry circle, one of Irelands favourite sons the fantastic
Insight into Derek’s past, his mistakes his solutions his goals and how he’s absolutely smashing it down in high wycombe!
You can find all the links in the podcast bio on apple, google Spotify and more and you can also follow derek here

Let us know what you think in the comments. Show derek some love!
Also without you the podcast is pointless so I Thankyou all for your likes, shares mentions and tags! Send this to a buddy, put in in your stories and let’s see if we can make this the biggest podcast yet! I’d quote happily let Spotify buy me for 100 million internet money
“Stick us in yer ears” - job and knock

06/12/2021

What’s left in your celebrations tin?
Quick snaffle of a few chocks with a brew this time of year “is the law”
But there is always the ones no one really likes?
What’s your bottom of the barrel look like?
Before you all say bounty’s are delicious
🍫

05/12/2021

Look again!
Decorators can be raging alcoholics, soulless empty men and women walking in a void of disbelief
And some are absolute wizards of the brush, artists of the paper and near origami black belts in tae-kwon-fold
Credit to who ever took the time to wall paper wrap this vent, the devil is definitely in the details and this is absolutely first class
Unfortunately I don’t know who did this? If you do tag them, if not Tag someone you know who should know about this bit of skill
We’re all tradesmen and women, we’re all in this together! If we all go the extra mile for each other the finish result is always gonna be SPOT ON
To all you painters and decorators already drinking at 9:25am in a Sunday! We also salute you! The worldwide painting and decorating crews your not all bad

15/11/2021

Got to love a sparky! A good one is worth their weight in gold, but we’ve all heard this one right?
Just for fun and the banter lads, play nice

15/11/2021

I love sparkies, a good one is worth its weight in gold but, they all say this…..
“Regsss matteee”
As always just for fun and banter, play nice

03/11/2021

Tuesday thoughts on a Wednesday!
Because it wouldn’t upload yesterday…….
Is the system pushing us all to be at work more and home less, when did it become you spend more time with work colleges than your actual family, the price of everything goes up every year on year on year keeping you at work more and more…….can we improve our work life balance, with mental health on the ever increase is an almost created “workaholaism” the real problem?
What do you think?

17/09/2021

It’s back….we’re back with another podcast
And what a way back with the much asked for much spoken about Scotland’s favourite Podcaster, life coach, golf pro, Father, Philanthropist, woodworker and funny guy
I was lucky to have Neil’s time to sit down and talk about life, woodwork, beginnings, goals, social media and much much more
Go give it a listen and let us know what you think in the comments below
You can find Neil here follow his links to his websites but some of his furniture or visit the merchandise I own some and it’s Cool as hell!
Neil also hosts a podcast with his buddy mark ever Wednesday at 7pm Live on you tube the Social Media Ruins Everything podcast, it’s very professional, funny and topical, I listen in and join in the chat when I can
Go on “Stick us in yer ears”..
As always thanks for listening, sharing, supporting the podcast and our social media, follow us on insta and tik tok and our website link in our bio
Find the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google and more⁣

14/09/2021

Roast me, Toast me, Butter me!
A dangerous game….but apart from their work, tradesmen banter is up there with the best….so here we go!
The amazing people at sent me this big box of all types of different cake bars, no joke I love the stuff, it’s like Christmas…but I’m a believer in paying forward, sharing and community
So I’m gonna send 1 pack of each of these flavours to the best Roast in the comments……
I know you won’t let me down⁣⁣

10/09/2021

“Get organised or die trying”
advice right there, and for free I might add! swipe up, something you’d hear from one of these online gurus anyway
Well I’m not educated enough to be a guru for anyone, maybe a gru at a push!
I won’t even be an Social media regurgitator and pretend it’s my idea, because I definitely saw this somewhere but I can’t remember where, so I expect you all to tag yourselves below to take full credit for this genius idea! A magnetic white board and magnetic week planner on the bulk head of the van
I mean not all of you can afford a PA and Staff like me so I’m just giving back and hitting you with some knowledge! This here is a GAME CHANGER for being organised on the go…..yes there is apps I could carry an iPad and a mac book pro in my reusable Starbucks cup as well, but these cost like £20 and don’t run out of battery, no wifi no cloud no monthly fee
Also notepads are available with pens…..so are briefcases
Stay tuned for 100% c**k and balls drawings on these bad boys in the future

13/08/2021

On’t Olerrdaay (On Holiday)
Not booked up till 3065? Me neither….nor bothered…..me niether
I’ve Spent a week on holiday, yes 7 days to you crazy f**ks, I slapped someone that said staycation and told him to take his bra off
I went up north Past the wall, where people miss out words add T t’most words and say all r**t
The was a few geordies and Mackems but nobody could understand them, surprisingly a few southerners not at mine head butlins as well which was quite continental for the locals
Contrary to popular belief the weather Apart from one afternoon was pretty decent, no wolfskin or fires needed in the frozen castles
The abundance of Nike trainers that look like hovercraft and gold chains over t-shirts was a lot lower than I’d of expected which was a welcome addition to going north
All in all a Great week spent with family, friends and even bumped into a couple of blokes from the gram which is always nice
Stop working so much, go on holiday, spend some time offline and with real people it will do you the world of good
Being said, I’m ready to get back into the swing of the podcasts again, I was far too busy before and it’s a dangerous slippery slope I hate getting into, so I’m not

21/07/2021

Best tool nicknames!
What nicknames do you call your what’sit! The fzzzzz fzzzzz, the doofer?
Best names for tools in the comments below GO

20/05/2021

This will resonate with more people here than I can even think about
Credit to “.idiot” on tiktok
If you know you know
“ gizalook then”

18/05/2021

Scottish cycling just hits different
Sent this via WhatsApp and it’s too good not to share
Caption this in the comments
Warning there is some swearing, for Scottish viewers the language is standard
Too fans too furious
If you know the creator or owner tag them in the comments

07/03/2021

“Your a shelf peg”
But when I was a boy (smaller peg) I wanted to be more, a life of holding shelves seems boring, hidden in a dark cupboard only to occasionally see the day from an open door, merely baring weight of countless knitted jumpers the humans never wear but insist on buying for them selves, I don’t mind a greggs knitted jumper mind you, that would be champions league shelf attire for a mere shelf peg like me, or I might get really lucky and hold some rich women’s dead cow satchel with Louis witton written on it, very strange people, very strange
I found myself inside quite a genius’s tool box, he would work utter magic on furniture, his hand often brushed past me as he installed another shelf, slowly John, Bill and Fred (other pegs) left me, I was getting close to my life’s purpose, a bloody shelf!
But then me and sue (another peg) were pulled aside in hand gently rolled like dice as the human thought, I could see his problem, he needed some kind of door stop and he didn’t want a bulky catch or unsightly fitting, he cast us on to cardboard like a seasoned craps player whilst he went deep into another box, he stuck me with a special hat and sue too, clear and rubbery, slight stickiness but smooth, hold on I said, wait sue, I think...he’s had an idea, what a stroke of pure genius, we won’t be shelf pegs sue, we’re going to be door stops sweetheart!
We watched as he expertly drilled countersunk 5mm holes for us to just...slide....right...in....the perfect depth for flush fitting doors, my dreams had come true, I was selected to not live my life as a shelf support but to be forefront, the main event, the God damn lead singer, a head liner, I shall hold the door and I shall do it better than any shelf support has ever done....I am not just a shelf peg, I am much much more I am “level pegging”
“An exert from the memoirs of ironmongery” - I used a shelf peg as a door stop looked rate in t’end

23/01/2021

An absolute classic
Last week I was on a lovely new build and the joiners on the job one was old and one young and the old guy had the holy grail of routers the old school stalwart or God of routers the Elu
This pretty much defined routers we use today in my opinion, the old guy said he’s had it for over 30 years and it’s still going strong
Yes 30 years!

13/01/2021

I think it was barbecue....
Episode 11 was with the fantastic Rick from
We’ve all had them first jobs and done some funny things.....If you haven’t find the podcast on Apple, Spotify, google and wherever you get yours
Stick us in yer ears and let us know what you think
Also find the webpage, drop us an email and check out the offers from our sponsors all available at...
www.JOBANDKNOCK.co.uk

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Newcastle Under Lyme

Website

http://www.jobandknock.co.uk/

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