My Bu****it Story.
Let’s go back to when I was 10 years old. Unfortunately, I won’t get to take you back any further than that.
Due to the traumatic experiences I faced at such an early age, many of the previous memories I had, were deleted - seriously, I would have to look through a photo album in order to remember things.
From what I DO remember, we always lived in rough places, council estates, dirty flats and blocks just like you see in the movies. We didn’t have it good and we never had the luxuries that some people have in life.
We had average upbringings, average christmases, average birthday’s and VERY average lives.
But what happened next made our lives far from average…
And for the next 18 years, I held this story back.
Until early 2018 when I decided to set fear to one side, I began to open up and be honest about what happened.
Just like you and the other 7.6 billion people out there, my story is unique - and I know it can help create impact in the world so holding it back wasn’t doing me or anyone else any good.
For safety purposes, names, locations and dates have been slightly altered.
I remember walking to the local shops with my mum to get a news paper. We always got on the with owner there, even though he caught me just weeks before stealing Pokemon cards and one of those collectable magazines with the ‘build the model’ cars things on the front, that day was no different..
He greeted us the same, with a smile and a wave.
My mum grabbed a paper, it had a story plastered all over the front page, headlined - “A body found”.
Where we lived, that was nothing unusual but I just remember her being quite off as she was talking to the shop keeper, but I didn’t think anything of it (on reflection, I think intuitively, she knew something was wrong)
We made our way back home. When we got there, there was a knock on the door, one of my brothers came walking in, crying, hugging my mum, barely able to speak. It was strange to see him in that state because he was always such a strong guy, always held his head high and acted the alpha in almost every situation.
He muttered something to her and that’s when my mum told me to go to another room.
Little did I know that the conversation going on in the next room would ultimately change my life forever. All of our lives, forever.
He proceeded to inform my mum that my other brother, the eldest one, had murdered somebody.
Without going into too much detail because it just isn’t necessary, he had bludgeoned the victims face completely unrecognisable during a black out.
She came in and told me. I’ll be honest, at 10 years old I couldn’t really comprehend what it meant for the family moving forward but I was about to find out.
So as a family, we stormed down to the local police station and turned him in, within 12 hours they had him in custody and before we knew it, our last name was in the papers.
You see, a lot of people assume that when something like that happens, the world for victims family is the only one that changes, right?
But turning him into the law was just the beginning.
Ours lives fell apart. Destruction unravelled at an unfathomable level.
It caused a serious ripple effect and things began to spiral out of control very fast.
The area we lived in was rough, like I said. A tough place to grow up and while my brother was in custody, the victims family and friends were obviously unable to get to him, so we quickly became the target, we were blamed, outcasted, attempts on our lives were made and we were pushed into hiding in our home as the council couldn’t move us right away - literally made hostage in our own home, until they found us some temp digs.
“Windows and doors were boarded up and we had police panic buttons installed in the house”.
One was situated downstairs and one upstairs, at the push of a button, the police would be there within 3 minutes ‘if’ anything happened.
And yes, you guessed it, s**t happened.
Multiple attacks on the property in the middle of the night, bricks being thrown at the house and the door being kicked in. At one point a gang of angry attackers almost got in and my brother had to stand at the top of the stairs with a knife in his hand with us behind him while we sat, huddled together waiting for the police sirens.
At 10 years old I was completely torn away from friends in school, people I grew up with as an infant, relationships just gone, almost overnight, I became very isolated and was outcasted.
Left feeling very confused as to why I was being labelled a ‘murderer’ when I hadn’t done anything wrong.
As time went on, eventually the council managed to move us, not permanently though, from one bed and breakfast to another, for almost 2 years while my mum battled and pleaded with them to keep us safe wherever we were.
We had barely no money, food was scarce, we even spent time in bed and breakfasts without basic things like a fridge.
I remember we would have to fill the sink with cold water overnight to store our milk for a cup of tea (yes, it keeps for around 8-12 hours in cold water in case you ever run out of electric - I won’t charge for that super life hack by the way).
After 2 years, a change of location and even a name change by deed poll, we finally got resettled and I ended up going back to school. It was an extremely hard thing to do, I was going through counselling at the time, something that even to this day I found to be useless.
So picture this for a moment;
A quiet, reserved, slightly awkward kid sitting in the corner of the classroom.
To the other kids, I was a target. I was picked on for my teeth, my curly hair and generally how weird my mannerisms and personality came across.
I found it incredibly difficult to have a conversation or look people in the eyes and I probably didn’t help myself because, quite frankly I was just a bit weird (still am today but I just embrace it now).
Couple years passed and school finished. I left with barely nothing in terms of grades - good job because I went on to find entrepreneurship, which was totally badass.
So there I was, a young adult, 17 years old facing new opportunities in life.
I saw college as a chance to break away from the people in school who picked on me, get away from being me and change my identity.
I still wasn’t in a good place after all the trauma and moving around. I couldn’t go anywhere without feeling paranoid and uncomfortable.
We get that chance around college to reinvent ourselves but the problem was, I just ended up doing drugs as a way to escape from reality. Ironically enough, it helped me cope with my paranoia. When I was on drugs, I was a different person, I wasn’t scared, I actually felt in control of my life for the first time in years.
It wasn’t long before I began to deal the drugs too.
I’m not proud of that but at the same time I don’t regret it and here is why…
I had developed this entrepreneurial mindset.
Now yes, granted at the time I didn’t know that’s what it was, I was just a mindless idiot selling drugs but on reflection, I genuinely believe I had traits forming that would come back later in my life and resurface, to serve a different market.
But back then..
I had a high quality product.
I provided quick delivery and great customer service.
I consolidated well and retained my customers.
I ensured they recommended me to a friend.
And I eventually scaled it by getting others to do some of the work for me.
And I was good at it.
I was just completely misguided and had no one in my life to look up to or show me the way forward.
By the time I hit the age of 20, I was taking drugs almost every day of my life, I had been arrested a few times (but not charged), lost a baby, cleaned out grow houses, spent a some cold nights in jail for mindless criminal damage and disorderly behaviour.
I even had 2 cars stolen and burnt out within the space of 6 weeks - to list just a few of my misdemeanours and blunders.
“My life was merely getting started yet it was so close to finishing. I always found myself in a negative place, both externally and internally”.
Emotionally dead, mentally broken and physically drained (I am surprised I didn’t turn to faith, but I am not completely sold on all that, plus, I like dinosaurs too much).
21 was a significant age for me.
I had a huge epiphany during a conversation with my mum one day.
She said
“If you carry on like this Matt, you are going to end up in prison (like my brother) or dead”.
At that moment, I realised that if I continued to live my life the way I was, she was right. A fork in the road appeared..
And although I honestly thought my life was pre-defined and that my story was already written, I began to make some SERIOUS changes in my life.
I entered personal development, small at first but gradually the steps I found myself taking led me down refreshing avenues of growth.
That wasn’t by any means overnight of course, it took an incredible amount of work and what felt like a billion ah-ha moments but most of all, it took me taking responsibility for myself and my actions.
I am aware now, years on that the reason it took me so long to make the changes I needed was because up until then, I was selling myself a real bulls**t story.
I can vouch for this..
CHANGE THE STORY - CHANGE YOUR LIFE.
That’s why I am so connected to storytelling because I understand the power it has, in both the tellers life and those that are listening.
Huge impact and connection.
And what has it done for my brand?
Well, if you are here now reading this then you’ll know. Since sharing my story, it’s allowed me to reach more people, inspire more people and the best thing, is sharing my story has given others permission to share theirs.
That’s why we focus heavily on storytelling in the Impact Movement and why I do the same with my clients.
So if you are ready, to not only ditch your bulls**t story but step up and share your story with the world through your personal brand, let me help you.
I would LOVE to hear from you sometime but if you want to reach out, the best way to reach me is by clicking this button and send me a message or if you would prefer to jump straight in with a strategy call, click here.
If you made it this far, I appreciate you.
And as always, if my story resonated with you or you got value from reading, just tell a friend about me, that’s all I ask.
Matthew Burbridge signing out (for now)
Take care and I will see you around.
Now go out there and create your hero-movement.
