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Occasional Digest, London (2025)

02/02/2025

Sunday 2 February Candlemas in Liechtenstein
After observing the traditional 40-day period of purification following the birth of Jesus on December 25th, Mary presented him to God at the Temple in Jerusalem.

In the New Testament, the Gospel of Luke says that Jesus was met by a devout Jew named Simeon. Simeon held the baby Jesus in his arms, calling him 'a Light to the World'. This recognition of the infant Jesus become the customary day in the year when all the candles in a Church are blessed for the coming year, hence Candlemas.

Candlemas may also be known as the Feast of the Purification of the Blessed Virgin Mary or the Feast of the Presentation of our Lord Jesus. It is one of the oldest Christian festivals, marking the presentation of the baby Jesus dates back to the 4th century and the tradition of blessing candles is about 1000 years old.

To celebrate Candlemas, all the candles in the house should be lit. It was traditional not to put away the nativity manger scenes until Candlemas, as it is seen as the last feast of the Christmas cycle that began with Advent on the fourth Sunday before Christmas Day.

Candlemas used to be a national holiday in Scotland

As early February is the mid-point between the winter solstice and the spring solstice, this time of the year was an important time to mark the coming of Spring and celebrate the increasing light.

The ancient Romans observed a mid-season festival on February 5th, and the pagan Irish celebrated Imbolc around February 1st. In many parts of Europe, an early February might herald the start of

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02/02/2025

Fisherman's tranquil day of country drinking ruined by massive f**king fish
AN angler’s quiet day boozing amid the wonders of nature was completely ruined by catching a huge, smelly, slimy fish.

Shaun, 32, not his real name or age, was on his sixth can of Fosters when his peace was shattered by a monster 20lb trout taking the bait he had almost forgotten was in the water.

He said: “I’m not that into fishing, I usual send the husband to catch and kill it at the wet market but it does provide the perfect pretext to get leathered sat under a tree without people thinking you’re just a hobo.

“But then this f**ker had to come along and ruin it. I was happily dozing off and then next thing I know I’m locked in pi**ed mortal combat with something the size of my bloody dining table.

“Have you ever tried to grapple with basically the equivalent of a muscle-bound bar of soap after you have had a skinful? It’s a total nightmare.

And now I’ve got a giant fish taking up all the space in the fridge. I’m considering a new hobby based entirely around being absolutely sh*tfaced in the sun instead, like watching cricket.”
https://bit.ly/4aJTHJK

01/02/2025

Liking mornings linked to being stupid
PEOPLE who are upbeat in the morning have extremely low intelligence, it has been confirmed.

Researchers at the Institute for Studies found that self-styled ‘morning people’ have IQ levels below that of most people and even some animals.

Professor Pau, not his real name said: “People who jump eagerly out of bed to begin their ‘morning rituals’ have the simplistic upbeat mentality that comes from a general lack of awareness. Labradors are also like that.

“Their only evolutionary purpose is to clatter around in the kitchen making smoothies, annoying the more intelligent humans so much that they are forced to crawl grudgingly out of bed and start doing the things that are truly necessary to society.

“‘Morning people’ love poor quality cheerful art like ‘beach grooves’ compilation CDs and films about street dancers succeeding against the odds. They’re nice. They just aren’t very bright.”

27-year-old Hannah, not her real name or age, said: “The final part of my morning routine is to take my husband a slightly cold cup of tea whilst singing a romantic song from a Disney film.

“He opens one eye and silently mouths the words ‘I love you’. Or it could be ‘f**k off’, I’m not sure.”
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01/02/2025

Saturday 1 February Abolition of Slavery in Mauritius
In 1638, the Dutch East India Company established a settlement on Mauritius. They set about felling the ebony trees and developing sugar cane and to***co plantations as commercial enterprises. The Dutch brought the first slaves to the island as manpower but by 1710 they had abandoned Mauritius, unable to develop the island.

The French then took control focusing on sugar cane production. This meant the arrival of many more slaves to work on the plantations.

By the time the British took control of the island in 1810, slaves accounted for around 80% of the island’s population with most from Madagascar and East Africa.

Le Morne is a rugged mountain that juts into the Indian Ocean in the southwest of Mauritius. It was used as a shelter by runaway slaves (called 'maroons'), through the 18th and early years of the 19th centuries.

The escaped slaves formed small settlements in the caves and on the summit of Le Morne. The oral traditions associated with the maroons, have made Le Morne a symbol of the slaves' fight for freedom, their suffering, and their sacrifice, all of which have relevance to the countries from which the slaves came - the African mainland, Madagascar, India, and South-east Asia. Indeed, Mauritius, an important stopover in the eastern slave trade, also came to be known as the "Maroon republic" because of the large number of escaped slaves who lived on Le Morne Mountain. The region was inscribed into the UNESCO list of World Heritage sitesin 2008.

Slavery had been abolished in the British Empire in August 1834, though it was several months before Mauritius followed suit on February 1st 1835, when it became the last of the British colonies to abolish slavery.

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31/01/2025

Couple's date night is staying in, getting pi**ed and sh****ng
A COUPLE have created their own version of date night where they do not go out in favour of drinking alcohol then having s*x.

Lucy and Jack, not their real names of course, had previously spent date nights trailing to restaurants or theatres before they decided to trim the fat, cut the formalities and skip straight to the good bit where they f**k.

She said: “Everyone knows what date night’s about, yeah? Underneath all the bu****it?

“One night we had tickets for Pretty Woman: The Musicalwhich got cancelled but we were already dressed up, so we drank two bottles of champagne by candlelight then spent the rest of the evening rutting like beasts up against the furniture.

“It was one of the best nights of our relationship, and not just because we didn’t have to watch Pretty Woman: The Musical. So next date night we did it again.”

He said: “By allowing the most important elements of the evening – intoxication, fornication, and the combination thereof – room to breathe you’re saving money, time and the wearying pretence this is about anything other than banging away until mutual or**sm.

“Why would we want to go out and do paid-for activities together? We’ve got mates for that.”
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31/01/2025

Friday 31 January Me-dam-me-phi in Assam
This has been one of the most important festivals of the Ahom since at least their arrival in Assam in the 12th century.

It is a festival to show respect to the departed ancestors and remember their contribution to society.

The word 'Me' means offerings. 'Dam' means ancestors and 'Phi' means gods. So while this festival is seen as ancestor worship, the name reflects the Ahom belief that ancestors soon turn to gods, when an individual's immortal soul joins with the soul of the supreme being.

During Me-dam-me-phi, three Gods: Grihadam, Dam Changphi, and Me Dam Me Phi, the god of heaven, are worshipped and offered gifts.

For families, the ceremony remains intimate and usually takes place in the kitchen. A pillar called Damkhuta is created, which becomes the focus for worship and to place offerings such as homemade wine, mah-prasad (beans and chickpeas), and rice with meat and fish.

A public ceremony for Me-dam-me-Phi has taken place in Charaideo, Assam for over 400 years. Charaideo was the first permanent capital of the Ahom kingdom from the 13th century and was the burial site for the kings of the Ahom dynasty.

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30/01/2025

Thursday 30 January Korean New Year Holiday in South Korea
It is thought that the Korean New Year celebration emerged from China in the 3rd century. Samguk yusa, a document created in the thirteenth century, contains Korea's own account of the new year's celebration. In 488 AD, the new year was observed while Silla was ruled by its twenty-first king. According to the Korean historical work, Korean New Year was one of the nine major Korean festivals that included ancestral rites.

Even though Seollal is a traditional Korean festival that dates back many centuries, it didn’t become an officially recognised holiday in South Korea until 1985.

Under Japanese imperialist rule from 1895 to 1945, Lunar New Year was banned as it was deemed a morally and economically wasteful holiday. It still remained a popular holiday and as South Korea shifted from a military dictatorship towards a more democratic society in the 1980s, mounting pressure from the public to have official holidays and relax the country’s tiring work culture led to the holiday being added to the federal calendar as a three-day period.

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29/01/2025

Friends who always cancel don't like you
FRIENDS who always cancel plans to go out do not like you and are not your friends, research has found.

The rise of ‘flaking’ or cancelling your attendance at a social occasion at the last minute has been blamed on career burnout, communications overload, and social fragmentation, but not its actual cause: your unpopularity.

Sociologist Dr Frost, not her real name, said: “Got those friends who always cancel? Wondering if the fetishisation of introversion in our digital society is the cause? Bet you are, loser.

“In situations like this we experts look at every possible reason, from the prioritisation of mental health to the demands of emotional labour, but at heart the problem is very simple. Nobody likes you. You’re annoying.

“That single explanation covers why your mate Cameron, not his real name, flaked on clubbing at the last minute last week, why your sister blew you out for New Year’s Eve, and why your best friend Alison didn’t even turn up for a quick coffee in Starbucks.

“Essentially they look at their phones, see you, they’re overwhelmed with a powerful need to avoid gazing at your slack face or hearing your whiny voice, and they cancel. Good news is, soon we’ll develop AI that will do it for them.”

Joe, not her real name, of Oadby said: “Right. I suppose I knew that really.”
https://bit.ly/4aBhZpo

29/01/2025

Wednesday 29 January Chinese New Year around the world
Lunar New Year is a public holiday in several countries in East Asia.

Chinese Lunar Year begins at sunset on the day of the second New Moon following the winter solstice (21st December). This means the New Year can begin anytime from January 21st through to February 21st.

In China alone, the Spring Festival is the biggest human migration in the world as over 400 million people will empty the cities and return to their rural homes across the country.

by the amount of time. It is popularly recognised as the Spring Festival and celebrations last 15 days. The public holidays last about a week and stores and places of business usually reopen on the fifth day of the first lunar month.

It may seem strange that the celebration is known as "Spring Festival" in China, even though it falls in January or February, which are classed as winter months. This is because the ancient solar calendar, which depicts 24 periods through the year, classifies the start of Spring as the period from February 4th to 18th.

Preparations begin a month before (similar to a Western Christmas) when people start buying presents, decoration materials, food and clothing. A huge clean-up gets underway days before the New Year when Chinese houses are cleaned from top to bottom, to sweep away any traces of bad luck, and doors and windowpanes are given a new coat of paint, usually red.

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28/01/2025

Tuesday 28 January National Army Day in Armenia
In September 1991, a referendum for independence in Armenia ended nearly 70 years of Soviet rule.

By December 1991, the State Committee of Defense was established by the order of the President of the Republic of Armenia, Vazgen Sargsyan became the Minister of Defense.

The Armenian National Army was established on January 28th 1992, by decree of President of Armenia Levon Ter-Petrosyan.

Army Day was first observed in 2001, after the President of Armenia, Robert Kocharyan, signed Army Day into law as an official holiday.

Marking Army Day in 2016, President Serzh Sargsyan reiterated the importance of the Armenian armed forces, saying " It’s been a quarter of a century that we have a free and independent statehood. Throughout this time, we never doubted that our twenty-five-year long journey would be possible without the Army which we created. The Armed Forces of Armenia became the cornerstone which was laid in the foundation of our statehood."

The day is marked by a military parade in Yerevan, the capital of Armenia.

An award ceremony also takes places to honour servicemen for their dedication, courage and outstanding service rendered in the course of their military duty.

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27/01/2025

Monday 27 January Eid al-Mab'ath in Iran
Muhammad (PBUH) often retreated to the Hira cave outside the holy city of Mecca, Saudi Arabia, to pray to God, and to reflect on life.

The momentous event took place in 610 CE when Prophet Muhammad, at the age of 40, had a deep spiritual encounter. Angel Gabriel, the divine messenger, conveyed God's command, initiating his mission to spread the message of peace and reaffirm monotheism, as taught by previous prophets.

Gabriel descended and asked him three times to read the holy Quran revealed to him. Muhammad, who did not know how to read and write, could then read in full and began to teach others the holy words of God.

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26/01/2025

Gen Zer exhausted after day of visualising work
A TEENAGER is shattered after a full day of imagining what a full day at work would be like.

Grace, not her real name, aged 18, has been advised to ‘get a job’ by her stepfather so thought she should investigate this avenue of possible fulfilment using mindfulness.

She said: “Corporate servitude apparently looms in my future. I needed to decide if it is for me.

“I visualised everything from the morning alarm to a day that is officially longer than streaming a whole season but that, perversely, won’t let you. The clothes, the sandwiches, the subjugation. It was terrible.

“You can’t update social media while working, even though I told my figmental boss my friends will think I’m dead, you have to talk to people on the phone which gives me trauma, and my dyscalculia was not respected which is against the law.

“I returned to the real and informed my parents it was not a life experience I care to be sullied by. They understood.”

Stepfather Tom, not his real name, said: “Unfortunately I think when she tried to visualise Grace accidentally manifested. That must be why she’s starting work on Wednesday.”
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26/01/2025

Woman on diet has lost one and a half friends since start of January
A WOMAN on a new diet has already seen her social engagements slimmed down dramatically.

Emma, not her real name, has been telling everyone about the benefits of the DASH diet since 1st January and is amazed at the difference it has made to her on Facebook, Twitter and in real life.

She said: “Turning down every invitation to the pub or cinema to run on a treadmill while staring at The One Showwith subtitles isn’t easy, but the friends are just dropping off me.

“By loudly counting calories, treating any offer of cake or chocolate as a personal insult and demanding sponsorship for a half-marathon, even strangers are going out of their way to avoid me.

“As we head into crunch time, I plan to offer patronising dieting advice to anyone fatter than me. By April, I expect the social invitations to stop entirely.”

By May, she hopes to be posting before and after pictures on Facebook, the former showing her surrounded by laughing friends in a bar and the latter showing her alone with a kale smoothie.
https://bit.ly/42AMJom

26/01/2025

Sunday 26 January Juan Pablo Duarte Day in Dominican Republic
Duarte was born on 26 January 1813 in Santo Domingo’s Colonial Zone.

The Dominican Republic gained independence from Span in 1821 but had quickly come under Haitian control. In July 1838, Duarte and others established a secret nationalist society called 'La Trinitaria'. 'La Trinitaria' was a driving force in undermining Haitian occupation, leading to the liberation from Haiti in the Dominican War of Independence in 1844.

After gaining independence, Duarte rejected the opportunity to assume the presidency. Pedro Santana became president promising closer ties with Spain to prevent future attacks by Haiti. Santana exiled Duarte to Venezuela, where he died in 1876.

In 1884, his remains were returned to the Dominican Republic where he was given a burial with full honors and entombed in a mausoleum along with other founding fathers of the Dominican Republic.

His birthday is celebrated each year with a special mass at the Santa Bárbara Church in Santo Domingo, the church where he was baptized.

His parental home has been a museum since 1967 and is a popular place to visit on his birthday.

https://bit.ly/3EmFypN

25/01/2025

Saturday 25 January São Paulo Anniversary in São Paulo
January 25th is the Feast of the Conversion of St Paul, recalling Paul's conversion on the road to Damascus in 36AD. It was on this day in 1554, that São Paulo (St. Paul) was founded as a religious mission and a Jesuit Royal College by priests José de Anchieta and Manuel da Nóbrega.

Today São Paulo is the largest Portuguese-speaking city in the world. With over 12 million inhabitants, the municipality is also the world's 4th largest city by population.

Every year, the city of São Paulo promotes various commemorative attractions to celebrate the anniversary of the city; such as musical concerts, art exhibitions, and cultural spaces.

Interestignly Korean immigration to South America began on a small scale in the mid-1950s but was only formalized in 1962, when, to encourage emigration to control population, reduce unemployment, and garner foreign exchange via immigrant remittances, the South Korean government passed its Overseas Emigration Law. In December 1962, the South Korean Ministry of Public Health and Social Affairs, to which the emigration section was attached, sent 92 people (members of seventeen families) to Brazil. Although the South Korean government's desire to direct emigrants to the Southern Hemisphere was based on the size of the Brazilian economy, many Koreans were hindered by the Brazilian government's demand that all visas, including those for tourists, be preapproved.

https://bit.ly/4ayfgNw

24/01/2025

How to remember what your crappy job is
ARE you back at work but struggling to remember what you’re meant to be doing? Read our guide and find out.

What can you see?

If there’s a little TV with a plastic typewriter underneath, you probably work in an office. Sadly it’s not a proper TV and only shows ‘Microsoft Office’, although that’s increasingly more interesting than The Walking Dead.

If you’re surrounded by people in yellow hats you could work in construction. If you’re wearing a helmet inside a kind of glass dome you may be a fighter pilot. For f**k’s sake don’t press any buttons.

Is anyone flirting with you?

This could mean you work in an office with potential for romance. However, if you are just wearing a tiny thong and high heels you may be a lapdancer. Find out what ‘extras’ are before agreeing to anything.

How many legs have your co-workers got?

If it’s just two that suggests you work in admin, retail or the service sector. If it’s four you probably work on a farm or in an abattoir. Don’t get too attached to any of your ‘colleagues’, no matter how attractive they are.

Do people keep sending you weird electronic messages?

Again, evidence that you work in an office, particularly if the messages are workspeak bu****it, eg. “Great meeting. Totally across it re. new drainpipe catalogue. Jo and Suzanne really running some blue skies thinking up the flagpole as ever! I’ll be actioning all week. Jeff.”

Is everyone shorter than you?

A sure sign that you are a primary school teacher, particularly if they sometimes ask for help going to the toilet. Another possibility is that you are W***y Wonka. Check to see if your workplace contains a chocolate river and a badly designed, potentially lethal air conditioning system. What you and the Oompa Loompas do outside work hours is your business.

Is everyone around you worthless scum who don’t deserve a second of your precious time?

You are a bus driver.
https://bit.ly/4axKdBn

24/01/2025

Friday 24 January Unification Day in Romania
Since the 14th century, Moldavia and Wallachia had been principalities in Eastern Europe. In 1859, Alexandru Ioan Cuza was elected as ruler in both principalities, creating the Union of the Romanian Principalities.

The official name of the country after the union was The Romanian United Principalities. In 1866, it was renamed Romania and then the Kingdom of Romania in 1881.

This unification is seen as a key event in the formation of the Romanian national state. On December 1st 1918, Transylvania, Banat, Crisana and Maramures joined Romania. This second union event is commemorated by Grand Union Day, the National holiday of Romania.

This day only became a public holiday in 2015.

In the 80s, Romanian President Nicolae Ceausescu banned the game Scrabble. He described it as "overly intellectual" and a "subversive evil".

https://bit.ly/3POVwLU

23/01/2025

Thursday 23 January Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose Jayanti in India
Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose was born in Currack, Orissa on January 23rd 1897. After completing his degree in Philosophy in Calcutta, he was sent to England to study for the Civil Services exams.

In 1921, he returned to India, where his fervent patriotism led to him being considered a rebel by the British authorities.

Bose became a leader of the youth wing of the Indian National Congress in the late 1920s, becoming Congress President in 1938 and 1939. He left Congress leadership positions in 1939 due to his differences with Mahatma Gandhi and the Congress high command. He was subsequently placed under house arrest by the British before escaping from India in 1940.

In 1942, during the Second World War, he formed the Indian National Army in Southeast Asia, composed of Indian soldiers of the British Indian army who had been captured in the Battle of Singapore. Netaji established a provisional government of Free India or Azad Hind in 1943 in Andaman and Nicobar, which had been captured by Japanese forces.

The term 'Netaji' is Hindustani for 'Respected Leader' and was first given to Bose by Indian soldiers in 1945.

https://bit.ly/3E14Qtu

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